A Donor's Thoughts

Speaking for myself, I keep my being a donor a secret because of a variety of reasons. I will try to explain my reasons as best as I can.
Most people would see a donor as being someone who is wants attention and can not get it any other way, not saying that some do not mind you. Can't you hear it? She/he is too fat,stupid, ugly to get friends, attention,sex the "normal" way.
I am afraid as being seen as a cutter or suicidal. Man, she/he must want to die or have a blood fetish.
My favorite "OH MY God ! She wants to be with "things of the devil'!
I am a nurse who works in surgery. If my secret of being a donor got out. I would NOT have a job. Seeing as I have to feed myself with no help, I do like to eat. Not to mention I would have my Sunday school class to pray for my soul.
Now I really admire someone who can thumb their nose at people and not give a crap as to what they think. But,I have to live in the world that is mine and my world would MAJOR freak if they knew I was a donor.
Addressing the process of finding a vampire to donate to, this is what I have in countered
I have placed several adds. Only had one "bite" (sorry could not resit the pun) so far. I donated one time and it was blood. Drove 2 and a half hours one way to do it. Next time he wanted to "feed" I was told he did not feel like it. Could have been something I did or vamp decied I was not his type; too much trouble. Who knows and yes I did try to talk it out with him.I tried to stay "professional" with it.
I am just going to say this and I am sorry to whom I make mad. First let me say this is MY feelings. I also understand you have to be very very careful with a donor you want to have "The" relationship with. It is just like friends you make off the Net, even the grocery store.
I feel alot of vamps have trouble finding a donor because they want someone they have known; someone who been in the "scene" awhile, or they grew up/hung out with. That is really the best, but, you are over looking a few of us to whom we came "late" to the scene too. Donors like me are in denial as to what they are as much as vampires do. I mean good night who wants the grief. To become a donor you are opening yourself up to alot of rejection just to be "food" to someone.
Some vamps are sooo afraid their "food" supply will become attached to them, they go without. Hate to break it to y'all unless your donor has no feelings they WILL become attached some what. No matter what they say. You just have to be prepared for that and make us know how much attachment you can take. Also, all of us donors are not young sweet tiny perfect/sexy people.
Phew, I feel better. As I said at the beginning this is speaking for myself. There are as many different feelings as there are kinds of donors. For myself, I like to fill needs that need to be met. Why else would I be a donor? There are alot easier things to be.
Giselle

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Giselle47,sang donor